This article first appeared in the Sunday edition of Malta Today 

Earlier this week I wrote that we seem to have become a people who have a poverty of spirit, and when reading comments and daily news stories it is easy to feel dejected as this impression keeps being confirmed.

And yet this week there were several instances where, out of a negative story, a shimmer of light seemed to shine through, giving me hope that maybe there are still enough people who can give us faith in the human spirit.

Nothing a nice cuppa’ can’t fix: Take the road rage incident on the Birkirkara bypass. A burly man flipped out during a verbal altercation in traffic, he got out of his BMW, took out some kind of tool from his boot and proceeded to assault the other driver (a tiny 61-year-old man) with it. Everything was captured on film. What floored me was the elderly man’s reaction: “Of course, I don’t think what happened was right. Who wants to get beaten when driving your car? But I forgive him for what he did and I wish we could just sit down and have a chat over tea and speak eye to eye, like men,” Mario Vella, 61, told the Times of Malta.
Mr Vella said he had just been informed the driver who attacked him had been visiting an ill family member at hospital.
“These things affect people differently and I know how it can throw you off balance,” he said.

I doubt I could be so magnanimous and forgiving, because I absolutely hate bullies, and yet Mr Vella in a few simple remarks has shown that it is possible to nip something which could potentially escalate in the bud. He looked at his attacker and saw past the savage behaviour, deciding to take the higher road. Not everyone is capable of this, in fact very few are, as the immediate reaction is to let out a stream of ugly adjectives to describe the ugly reaction of the driver of the BMW. But Mr Vella’s handling of the situation shows that unless someone takes the first step we will be doomed to an endless vicious circle of verbal and physical abuse and the eventual complete breakdown of our society.

Don’t ask a question you do not already know the answer to: It is easy to give up and assume that the majority will go along with anything as long as there is money to be made. It was therefore a pleasant surprise to see that an online poll conducted by one.com.mt (the Labour Party news portal) to assess how the public feels about the proposed high rise buildings, yielded results which I’m sure the Government was not really expecting. At the time of writing, 60% think it’s a bad idea (although at one point this figure had reached 83% until someone probably realized that the poll was not going the way they had hoped and, I suspect, rallied the party faithful to vote). Over 4000 people have already voted, so that percentage is a positive sign because it means that not everyone is ready to just lie down and take whatever is thrown at them without even a whimper. The optimist in me stirred up again, despite the fact that it is so very tempting to just shrug and become a cynic.

The comforting embrace of an island community: What can be more devastating than the loss of a child? When Hungarian national Angela Murinai learned that her teenage son had drowned at sea off Marsalforn after being caught in the strong currents, she made the decision to bury him on the island of Gozo as a way to connect her wth the place which had shown her so much solace and respect as the search for him went on. She wrote a moving letter as a thank you to Gozo residents and the authorities who helped her, which demonstrates the powerful strength of a mother who has turned her heart-wrenching loss into a beautiful tribute. Her letter shows that when we do not withdraw into bitterness, blame and anger after a tragedy happens (which would be quite a normal, understandable reaction) it is the first step towards healing. It is an enormously difficult thing to do of course – how many of us could do it? Probably only a handful at the most. But these are the type of people we should look up to, because the sheer depth of their breathtaking courage is something we should all aspire to.

Social media is our voice – The outrage at the inflated prices for deckchairs and umbrellas which have taken over Comino spread all over Facebook this week, and someone in authority is finally listening. Tourism Minister Edward Zammit Lewis tweeted that the situation was unacceptable and that the Tourism Authority would take legal action. The MTA promptly listed the maximum prices which can be charged (ranging from 5 Euro for just an umbrella to 20 Euros for a sunbed and umbrella). The Authority urged the public to ask for a fiscal receipt and report the cases where they are overcharged. Sure we have heard it all before, and I will believe it when I see this clampdown on abuse happening. What people want to see most of all is areas which are deckchair free so that they are not forced to hire one just to sit on a public beach. The positive aspect of all this is that members of the public have finally realized that by kicking up a fuss in the most visible platform ever invented, their complaints are impossible to ignore.

Having said all this, I don’t want to sound like some wide-eyed Pollyanna who believes that everything is peachy keen. Along with the above stories there were also others which can further plunge us back into pessimism about the state of the world. We had yet another incident sparked by the undertones of racism which are never far from the surface. An argument between two women, one Maltese, the other African, ended up with racial slurs being hurled, even by passersby.

In general, I think aggressiveness is increasing through a lethal combination of overcrowding, an explosion of vehicles and traffic chaos, together with a melting pot of cultures which have been thrown together in a very short space of time on a tiny rock where locals were completely unprepared for what this sudden influx of other nationalities would mean in reality. On top of that it’s hot and sticky as it is every summer, and those who are hotblooded by nature, have an even shorter fuse.

Sure, life here on this island can be exasperating, things don’t work as they should, while the noise, the pollution and the sheer lack of discipline leave us fuming. Sure, we can go round flaring up and arguing with everyone we meet, but unless we try to reverse this attitude I think we will honestly end up killing each other with incandescent rage. Or, we can take a deep breath and try to look for the good which does exist in human nature (and despite all odds, yes there is still some out there). As trivial as it may sound, sometimes all it takes is a small gesture. I find that when I give way and let someone pass in front of me on a roundabout, or wave to pedestrians to go ahead and cross when no one else is stopping, I can see their faces change from tense frowns to a surprised smile. Corny as it sounds, I feel better, and hopefully their mood has improved too and maybe they will pay it forward.

Let’s face it, the alternative is a situation where people think it’s perfectly OK to beat each other up with tools.